I have always been an active sporty girl, at school in South Africa (where i grew up) I played in the top teams for basketball and touch footie.
Just before I turned 16 my mum moved us to the UK London. My parents were both English, when they divorced mum wanted to return to her family.
Unfortunately there were no girls sports team at my new school.
Down the road from our house there was a gym though!! I got a job there... an old school bodybuilding gym where my career/life and passion began!
My home life was not a happy one, the gym, Beauty & the Beast Thornton Health became my home, my happy place and where I felt safe. A place where life was simple, results were guaranteed & stress relief 100% satisfied. The culture and sense of family was something i cherished and needed!
Surrounded by focused, knowledgeable and inspirational bodybuilders was an environment i found so motivating and LOVED!! I soon came to realise I was one strong woman! LOL!
Becoming stronger in the gym lifted my non-existent confidence & self esteem. Making life outside the gym better too, my previous persona being of a sheep, hiding and doing everything to not stand out or be noticed...well that began to change!
As the years went by I grew into myself. Learning from idols, role models. Also learning from mistakes & assholes.
But I would battle all and more to find myself!
Despite the instability of my life, the gym was my constant. I could focus, think, relax, BE ME!
Life was getting better.....
BUT as in any long AF life story...lol..
I got knocked back down again...why? Because that is life... I had more to learn, more self improvement to make and issues to work through to grow.
Moving to Australia, gave me a fresh start.... not a perfect one by all means. Another learning curve, a man I thought I loved, who was in fact a heroin addict.
I lost everything - most importantly I lost ME, my sparkle. I was numb for almost 3 yrs, living day by day - looking for the light. A blur, my body couldn't check out but my mind and heart did. This challenging time also gifted me a new life start in Australia. Which has turned out to be the best decision of my life!
Additionally, the realisation that I let someone take my sparkle was the the biggest & best lesson of my life.
Did it hurt yes.... did it take time to recover yes...BUT now I have everything I could ever or did ever dream of....plus more!
Eventually i realised after many years of pain that I was still giving those bastards power.
And so the healing began.
it was not easy.
Mixed amongst this story is my competitive career which started in 2010.
An amazing group of people led my way - helped me, guided me and encouraged me. They believed in me!
WOW! To be honest my first comp prep was awful & amazing all at once- wrought with doubt, second guessing, not knowing what was happening or what to expect. It was also the beginning of the healing of my mind as well as the journey toward loving myself in turn improving my self esteem, confidence and body image distortion.
Going back to my younger years of feeling unloved and undeservedly so, I felt if my physical appearance was perfect i would be loved.
Before finding my passion for weight lifting, i suffered from bulimia. Training, being at the gym & learning about bodybuilding i found a huge conflict with this eating disorder. How can i grow beautiful muscles or get stronger if i don't eat properly????
And so.... the nutrition became my topic of study along with my training. The eating disorder faded out of my life. BUT the demons remain in a small part of your psyche.... it took a few years, mentally battling them and the fear that fuels it, fear that if you are fat no one will love you.
MY FIRST COMPETITION:
I competed in 2010, in Open Figure with NABBA/WFF.
I WON!!!! OMG!! What a feeling!!
Backstage i couldn't see or hear or talk to anyone, focused on standing on stage for the first time, posing and doing a routine.
As soon as i did stand on that stage...WOW WOW WOW.... I FUCKING LOVED IT!! I was home!! I felt proud knowing i was at my best i had ever been, worked 100%, ..through tears fears and hunger.
Done all my training, stuck to my nutrition plan, practiced posing until i cried.....
The tingles i will never forget - the smile on my face was ear to ear. For the first time of my life i was proud of myself.
And there begins my competitive career...
22 competitions in total... so far ;-)
NABBA/WFF Figure Category
2010 Overall Figure Champion QLD
2nd Figure Tall NATIONALS
2012 Overall Figure Champion SOUTHERN HEMISPHERES
Overall Figure Champion QLD
Overall Figure Champion NATIONALS
3rd Figure(superbody) WFF WORLDS AUSTRIA
IFBB Open Physique
2014 - 2016
11 competitions including competing at the very First ARNOLD CLASSIC AUSTRALIA in Melbourne -
a proud 2nd place!
2017 Figure 1st place GOLD COAST
Figure 1st place WORLDS LONDON - PRO CARD WINNER!
oh wow, one of my proudest moments and achievements in my career!
2018 no placing WORLDS LAS VEGAS ( i have only had 2 in my long career - placing top 3 in 20 comps)
IFBB Open Physique
2020 Open Physique 1st place QLD
2nd Open Physique ARNOLD CLASSIC AUSTRALIA
NEXT STEP.....? Who knows in terms of competitions.
What i do know is that every day i learn more, love more and help more people learn to take care of their bodies and minds.
Thank you so much for being part of this community!!
Please check me out and follow me
Lots of laughs, honesty and fun.... guaranteed!!